NYE in Fort Cochin

Before I get started on what we got up to in Cochin a mention does need to go to a remarkable hither to untapped gift that Tony 'the silver fox' Wellard possesses. Namely Catalogue posing.

We had it in our heads that Dad and Sue really should do some travel by train whilst we were with them, and after a hair raising time on the chaotic roads down to Kanyakumari, they were happy to give it a go. Whilst our journey to Alleppey saw us on a quite cosmopolitan commuter train with people heading from Trivandrum to Cochin, we had failed to book tickets for the Alleppey to Cochin section and decided that we'd live like a local and just buy an unreserved 3rd class ticket and see what happened. What happened was not unlike buying a standard class ticket in England. We stood in the aisle by the toilets for 2 hrs. Thankfully this cost us about 50p each, rather than £50 like it would at home.

Cochin is famous for its Chinese fishing nets.

They didn't look the most efficient means of fishing to me.

Dad and Sue treated us to a very fancy lunch in Hotel Malabar, where Nic got her mitts on her first glass of wine in months.

The rest of drinking venues we came across weren't quite as posh (see below) and we actually ended up tucked up in our beds before midnight. We really are gettin old.

There wasnt really much to apart from wonder round the winding old streets that had a definite European feel from their days as a Portuguese trading post.

The Portuguese even left their mark with Catholicism being the dominant religion

Only the cats seemed to be Hindu

After our dealings with Israeli backpackers in S America, we were suspicious about visiting the Jewish area of town.

Pornstar Ganesha

An unlikely promise

A very typical scene in India. Cricket is played on every spare scrap of land. These boys had a branch as a bat. They seam to learn just 2 shots; the forward defensive and slog.

Urban goats replaced the urban cow of the north

I'm sure I could get that in most towns back at home free of charge

We dare you to go 5 times?

In Cochin, I got slightly obsessed with the bizarre posters for Candyman's circus.

Would you take your kids?

Backtwatters on the backwaters and a dry New Years

Kerala, or 'God's Country' as they like to call it, is famed for its beaches, its freely elected socialist government, having a high proportion of Christians, Kathakali, drinking coffee not chai, its backwaters and Fort Cochin. So after a lazy fortnight of experiencing the front end of that list, we set off for Alleppey and a backwaters cruise and then Fort Cochin for New Years Eve. The backwaters are a maze of channels and lakes between the coast and the mountains of the western ghats. Some time ago some bright spark decided to convert a rice barge to a houseboat, and offer cruises around the backwaters. It created a monster and now Alleppey is a huge tourist destination, ambitiously billed as the Venice of India. I don't think many of the visitors were cramming in 4 to a rickshaw like we were though. There weren't many backpackers about, just huge groups of middle age middle class Europeans, alot of Americans wearing big trainers and sun visors and a good smattering of the new Indian middle class to complete the mix.

We knew it was going to be beautiful, but were worried that it would've been ruined by the influx tourists and that our houseboat might not be up to much. India is the land of big promises that don't come true. How wrong we were

People seemed to be still going about their business much the same as they must've done before they were invaded by tourists, and the backwaters were big enough to accommodate everyone without it feeling like Piccadilly Circus at rush hour, except on the M1 of canals above

We couldn't work out how they got their clothes clean, or why they weren't getting ill because they used the canals not only not get about, but to bathe in, drink from and as rubbish bin. One lovely image that will stay with me is an old lady prodding the bloated carcass of dead goat away from her home with a big pole, whilst a woman next door did her washing.

It was a wonderfully relaxing experience, gently chugging around the canals watching the world go by, chatting, reading and sleeping, and of course waving at Indians excited about seeing white people.

This fella sold dad the worlds biggest prawns for his dinner. I'd like to take this opportunity to apologise dad for being critical of his bartering skills. People go on about, 'Oh, India changed me'. Its just changed me into someone who sporadically gets really narky about having to barter for everything. The sunset that night was beautiful, and after an enormous meal we settled down for games of cards and generating Kingfisher hangovers

(honest there's no cards hidden up here!)